اﻟﺮﺷﻴﺪ ﻭاﻷﺻﻤﻌﻲ
ﻣﻠﺢ اﻷﺻﻤﻌﻲ ﻭﻏﺮاﺋﺒﻪ
)) “ ﻭﺃﻧﺖ ﻃﺎﻟﻖ ﺇﻥ ﺃﺟﺎﺯ ﺯﻭﺟﻚ ﻣﺤﻤﺪ ﺑﻦ اﻟﻐﺎﺭ !!!! “ ((
ﻗﺎﻝ ﺣﺪﺛﻨﻲ ﻋﺒﺪ اﻟﺮﺣﻤﻦ ﺑﻦ ﻣﺤﻤﺪ اﺑﻦ ﺃﺧﻲ اﻷﺻﻤﻌﻲ ﻗﺎﻝ ﺳﻤﻌﺖ ﻋﻤﻰ ﻳﻘﻮﻝ ﺗﻮﺻﻠﺖ ﺑﺎﻟﻤﻠﺢ ﻭﺃﺩﺭﻛﺖ ﺑﺎﻟﻐﺮﻳﺐ
ﻭﻗﺎﻝ ﻋﻤﻰ ﻟﻠﺮﺷﻴﺪ ﻓﻲ ﺑﻌﺾ ﺣﺪﻳﺜﻪ ﺑﻠﻐﻨﻲ ﻳﺎ ﺃﻣﻴﺮ اﻟﻤﺆﻣﻨﻴﻦ ﺃﻥ ﺭﺟﻼ ﻣﻦ اﻟﻌﺮﺏ ﻃﻠﻖ ﻓﻲ ﻳﻮﻡ ﺧﻤﺲ ﻧﺴﻮﺓ !!!!
ﻗﺎﻝ ﺇﻧﻤﺎ ﻳﺠﻮﺯ ﻣﻠﻚ اﻟﺮﺟﻞ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺃﺭﺑﻊ ﻧﺴﻮﺓ ﻓﻜﻴﻒ ﻃﻠﻖ ﺧﻤﺴﺎ ???
ﻗﺎﻝ ﻛﺎﻥ ﻟﺮﺟﻞ ﺃﺭﺑﻊ ﻧﺴﻮﺓ ﻓﺪﺧﻞ ﻋﻠﻴﻬﻦ ﻳﻮﻣﺎ ﻓﻮﺟﺪﻫﻦ ﻣﺘﻼﺣﻴﺎﺕ ﻣﺘﻨﺎﺯﻋﺎﺕ ﻭﻛﺎﻥ ﺷﻨﻄﻴﺮا
ﻓﻘﺎﻝ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻣﺘﻰ ﻫﺬا اﻟﺘﻨﺎﺯﻉ ﻣﺎ ﺇﺧﺎﻝ ﻫﺬا اﻷﻣﺮ ﺇﻻ ﻣﻦ ﻗﺒﻠﻚ ﻳﻘﻮﻝ ﺫﻟﻚ ﻻ ﻣﺮﺃﺓ ﻣﻨﻬﻦ اﺫﻫﺒﻰ ﻓﺄﻧﺖ ﻃﺎﻟﻖ ...
ﻓﻘﺎﻟﺖ ﻟﻪ ﺻﺎﺣﺒﺘﻬﺎ ﻋﺠﻠﺖ ﻋﻠﻴﻬﺎ ﺑﺎﻟﻄﻼﻕ ﻭﻟﻮ ﺃﺩﺑﺘﻬﺎ ﺑﻐﻴﺮ ﺫﻟﻚ ﻟﻜﺎﻥ ﺣﻘﻴﻘﺎ ‘‘‘
ﻓﻘﺎﻝ ﻟﻬﺎ ﻭﺃﻧﺖ ﺃﻳﻀﺎ ﻃﺎﻟﻖ !!!
ﻓﻘﺎﻟﺖ ﻟﻪ اﻟﺜﺎﻟﺜﺔ ﻗﺒﺤﻚ اﻟﻠﻪ ﻓﻮاﻟﻠﻪ ﻟﻘﺪ ﻛﺎﻧﺘﺎ ﺇﻟﻴﻚ ﻣﺤﺴﻨﺘﻴﻦ ﻭﻋﻠﻴﻚ ﻣﻔﻀﻠﺘﻴﻦ
ﻓﻘﺎﻝ ﻭﺃﻧﺖ ﺃﻳﺘﻬﺎ اﻟﻤﻌﺪﺩﺓ ﺃﻳﺎﺩﻳﻬﻤﺎ ﻃﺎﻟﻖ ﺃﻳﻀﺎ !!!
ﻓﻘﺎﻟﺖ ﻟﻪ اﻟﺮاﺑﻌﺔ ﻭﻛﺎﻧﺖ ﻫﻼﻟﻴﺔ ﻭﻓﻴﻬﺎ ﺃﻧﺎﺓ ﺷﺪﻳﺪﺓ ﺿﺎﻕ ﺻﺪﺭﻙ ﻋﻦ ﺃﻥ ﺗﺆﺩﺏ ﻧﺴﺎءﻙ ﺇﻻ ﺑﺎﻟﻄﻼﻕ §§
ﻓﻘﺎﻝ ﻟﻬﺎ ﻭﺃﻧﺖ ﻃﺎﻟﻖ ﺃﻳﻀﺎ !!!
ﻭﻛﺎﻥ ﺫﻟﻚ ﺑﻤﺴﻤﻊ ﺟﺎﺭﺓ ﻟﻪ ﻓﺄﺷﺮﻓﺖ ﻋﻠﻴﻪ ﻭﻗﺪ ﺳﻤﻌﺖ ﻛﻼﻣﻪ
ﻓﻘﺎﻟﺖ ﻭاﻟﻠﻪ ﻣﺎ ﺷﻬﺪﺕ اﻟﻌﺮﺏ ﻋﻠﻴﻚ ﻭﻋﻠﻰ ﻗﻮﻣﻚ ﺑﺎﻟﻀﻌﻒ ﺇﻻ ﻟﻤﺎ ﺑﻠﻮﻩ ﻣﻨﻜﻢ ﻭﻭﺟﺪﻭﻩ ﻓﻴﻜﻢ ﺃﺑﻴﺖ ﺇﻻ ﻃﻼﻕ ﻧﺴﺎﺋﻚ ﻓﻰ ﺳﺎﻋﺔ ﻭاﺣﺪﺓ ...
ﻗﺎﻝ ﻭﺃﻧﺖ ﺃﻳﻀﺎ ﺃﻳﺘﻬﺎ اﻟﻤﺆﻧﺒﺔ اﻟﻤﺘﻜﻠﻔﺔ ﻃﺎﻟﻖ ﺇﻥ ﺃﺟﺎﺯ ﺯﻭﺟﻚ ﻓﺄﺟﺎﺑﻪ ﻣﻦ ﺩاﺧﻞ ﺑﻴﺘﻪ ﻗﺪ ﺃﺟﺰﺕ ﻗﺪ ﺃﺟﺰﺕ ..!!!